This morning I'm on a mission to import songs from my massive CD collection onto my Ipod. And no, I'm not trying to sound all cool bragging about my CDs, because they're all pretty much from high school and my early 20s. It's a trip down memory lane, that's for sure.
I pretty much forgot I owned most of the CDs I have. In my car, I have about 20 I listen to on a regular rotation, but the hundreds of others I have just sort of sat in a CD book in my closet. So, it's been fun. I have very specific memories associated with a lot of them.
For example: Counting Crows; August and Everything After was my first CD ever purchased. Ever. I was in EIGHTH GRADE. That is age thirteen. Thirteen years ago. (god I feel old sometimes) And it still plays perfectly. With all the CDs I've lost and destroyed, how this one survived from 1995 is a mystery to me. I will never forget my mom finally buying a little black portable boombox from K-mart, the first CD player to enter our household, and me spending what felt like hours going through the CD selection to pick one. I was dying with anticipation on the long ride home, clutching the yellow case and staring out the window.
I ran to my bedroom and didn't return for 3 days. I memorized every lyric and note, even played it on repeat while I slept. I sometimes wish today that I had the same passion I had for music when I was 13.
I saved every penny I came across, all to buy new albums. I remember "camping out" in the backyard in my parents motorhome, listening to Green Day and Better Than Ezra over and over with my friend T. I'll never forget when an older boy told me what "Longview" was really about. I remember at first I didn't believe him, but then I listened again and it all started to make sense. Then he really explained it to me. I've never been the same since.
I already had Nevermind on cassette, but I got it on CD and came close to wearing it out. I thought I was cool and could learn guitar, and played along to Come As You Are until my parents were twitching and convulsing on the floor. It's still the only song I can play on a guitar, all these years later.
Weezer was an obsession, even though I couldn't quite grasp their weirdness at such a tender age. Bush was the ultimate obsession, or maybe it was Gavin Rossdale's extreme hottness, but either way, I was a music junkie.
And listening to these, stumbling across ancient memories, made me smile a little. For the first time in a long time, I wish I could be 13 again.
Can't forget Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, The Lemonheads, Mudhoney, Alice In Chains, Hole... and flannel shirts, ripped corduroys, combat boots and long hair. The music that literally changed my lifestyle, helped me grow up, and got me my first make out session with the biggest crush of my life.
But then I kept going, and there's another chapter. 1997, 98, 99. Nine Inch Nails, Tool, White Zombie, Pantera, Korn, System of a Down... I could almost taste the smoke, the beer, the staight vodka. Feel my short skirts with tall black boots (I pretty much invented this combo, in my small town at least), my dyed burgandy, short hair, my black eyeliner. Driving around aimlessly, just to smoke a joint and listen to music. Really. Loud. Bonfires at the beach, making out, laughing, not meaning to cause trouble but doing it anyway. Endless concerts. Sweaty mosh pits, crowd surfing, my shirt being ripped off, entranced by the music, deaf ears and smiles after the show. The time of my freakin life. Once again, listening to these songs today, I wanted to travel back in time. I miss having fun. Stupid, clueless, reckless, invincable fun.
But for now, I guess I will relive my youth while running around the block, or doing my 200 crunches, or vaccuming the living room.
I need to start creating good memories again. I have to wonder if 10 years from now, I'll look back at 2006, 07, 08 as anything but painful.
Sure, I had amazing times. But they all led to this moment. Me, alone. Again.
Next on the list: Emo. 2002. Apparently.
So, what about you guys? Anyone out there? What's a song or album that will always and forever transport you back in time?
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5 comments:
oh I'm old, teenage summer with Def Leppard, K and his scorpions that he kept in his car, learning to smoke cigarettes. Finding my rebellious side and my first boyfriend. The Cassete of course with Pyromania on it. That one always takes me back to almost being there. Uggh dare I say 15 was 25 years ago? I have alot more, some from when I worked in the pub that remind me of certain people everytime I hear them. Many more from teenage years and my and my best gf thinking we could be head bangers. They all have certain albums that go with them. It's funny how music can transport you, it can almost make you smell the air that surrounded you during that time, smoke and all.
C
It's so funny... It's the closest tihng to time travel I've experienced. =)
I was rifling through my old collection, and I realized something: I'm not cool. While I was fully aware of this fact, it became painfully obvious when I happened upon my numerous broadway musical soundtracks, Beethoven and Mozart CDs, and a whole lot of movie soundtracks that are just dreadful. I mean, who bought the soundtrack to Jerry Maguire? Eww.
Here you go, as per your request, the link to the Lost Users Message Board.
Thanks Adam.
Also- Jerry Macguire?
Really?
Beethoven and Mozart are great though =)
Wait Adam, I'm cool and I bought the sound track to Jerry Maguire. I can't remember why but I remember there was something on there I really liked and some stuff that I didn't at all.
C
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